I want a NICE guy, but not YOU.
Greetings Internet, apologies for such a prolonged time between posts, I was busy trading blows with life and just did not have time to share my thoughts. Throughout the last few months I’ve had to deal with the same recurring theme, not just with me and my personal experiences but of those close to me as well, this of course provoked me into thinking long and hard about all of this, and this is what I have concluded.
The topic is simple : “Why do girls never notice that the guy they have always wanted, is the very guy that they push into the famous ‘FRIENDZONE'”.
This is unfortunately a place that I know quite well from my personal experiences and the fact that I am `Sapiosexual` (One who finds intelligence the most sexually attractive feature) and `Demisexual` (A person that does not experience sexual attraction unless they form a strong emotional connection with someone) does not always help my cause because I will always try to get to know a girl before I try to get more serious , usually by the time I realise that I am attracted to her, I’m already boxed in the friend-zone.
Im sure that most of us have during our time on this floating rock have heard this phrase before. It’s an ironic dilemma that I find most `nice` guys face on a regular basis. From my personal experiences in life , it’s happened to me countless times. You go out with friends and within your friends group is someone who you see as a little more special than the rest and then they come out with this beauty “All I want is a nice guy that I can count on” and you stare into their eyes and you just think “I am that nice guy , all you need to do is open your eyes” .
Girls are very interesting creatures and I have slowly come to the realisation that girls are a lot more picky when it comes to finding a partner than us guys . Yeah sure , guys all have their own tastes, likes, dislikes and attractions and we do generally stick to them. but at the same time, I know a lot of guys (including myself) that don’t really care in the end what she looks like or how many boxes she tics for us because I believe in the end guys just all want that one girl who understands them more than anything. And this of course goes without saying that I don’t speak about `players` , assholes and pricks who only want one thing from girls – the way i see it : if you are consciously going out and using a person for only one thing, and you know that it might hurt them in the end – well then congratulations because you are an asshole.
I often find myself wondering in sleepless nights, how many times girls get themselves hurt because they took the wrong option, they take the guy that seems cool and wild and fun with that carefree attitude and that YOLO word comes to mind , instead of the nice guy that is relaxed, caring, thoughtful and always there for you. And in the end the ironic thing is that when that wild guy ends up dropping you for someone else and you are hurt and need to have someone put you back together again, it’s the nice guy that sits there next to you – feeling your pain and thinking to himself “I would never have done this to you”.
I have always been of the belief that there is no such thing as a plutonic relationship. The only way it actually works is when the guy is gay and then is it still really plutonic in this case? In all honesty girls , if a guy is kind towards you and caring, even maybe slightly protective over you – he is not trying to be your best friend, he is trying to show you that he wants to be your everything, and I know the retort from the girl’s camp is going to be something like “Why does he not say something” , and my reply is simple – he does , everyday when he is there `watching your back` , he is not only saying something – he is showing you , he is showing you that he won’t go anywhere. And he probably won’t ever say anything because girls have this wonderful way of saying something in-between the lines , you know it we all know it, a line that follows something like this – “How have I been so lucky to have a ‘FRIEND’ like you?” or something of that sorts (there are millions of ways to say it).
My best advice that I can give to the ladies out there, its simple – if you have that ‘FRIEND’ guy in your life (I’m sure a name just popped up) and you are tired of being hurt by assholes and people that leave you when you need them most, take a closer look at this guy and you will realise that your knight in shining armour , that nice guy that you pray for and always wished for has always been there , you just threw him in the friend’s zone.
Go forth in peace and prosperity.
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